Author: Jessica

Washington is my home, but I am attending school in Idaho. I am currently a Child Development Major but I am exploring the Social Work program. Helping people is what I am passionate about and I love to hear others opinions, please comment and let's have a conversation!

Blended

I do not come from a blended family, nor am I close to any blended families. In an older parenting book for blended families they mention 4 guidelines. Ready, set, here they are:

  1. It will take a minimum of 2 years to reach normalcy.
  2. The birth parent needs to do all of the harsh discipline.
  3. The step-parent needs to act like an aunt or uncle. (talk to the children, understand them, but stand by the spouses decision to discipline)
  4. Parents need to conference with each other every night (without the children around)

I feel that in every home, blended or not, parents should talk about the day every night. It is important to communicate what each spouse is feeling and make goals together to improve the family. Share with me your experiences as blended families. I would love to hear what advice you have for others.

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The Wild Child

Have you noticed the more you nag and tell your children to do something, the less likely they are to do it. Here are some steps to try to make a difference in the way you approach asking your children questions:

  • Use a polite request (Would you please pick up your clothes after your done reading?)
  • next try an “i” statement (I would appreciate if you would help me clean the house by picking up your clothing)
  • if that doesn’t work use a stronger statement (It makes me feel like I am a maid when you leave your clothes around the house, please pick them up now and we can discuss a consequence if you keep leaving your clothes around the house.)

Another suggestion is to use natural consequences. There should be a link between the action and consequence. If you take away a child’s cell phone for not doing the dishes, there is no connection between them. If your child never fills your car up with gas after driving around then you can tell them next time they leave the car on empty they will have to find another ride to their friends house. There is a connection in the second scenario: not filling up the car equals not driving the car.

These steps with your children and tell me what worked best for you!

I’m Trying to be like Jesus

In Mosiah 18:8-10 it teaches us what we should do to be Christ-like.

  • Be willing to bear one another burdens
  • Mourn with those who mourn
  • comfort those who stand in need of comfort
  • Stand as a witness of God

The best parenting manual is the scriptures. Who else is more perfect than Jesus Christ, his example to us is perfection. We can always be working on becoming better people. What can you do today to become a better person?

Technology is Killing Our Communication

When we talk to someone face to face our non-verbal communication makes up 51% of how the other person interprets what we are saying, your tone makes up 35% of communication, and words only make up 14%. How much of what we are trying to communicate is actually going through to the other person if we only text them? Are all thee technological advances the problem for people not communicating? I would say no. We are in charge of our own actions and we can monitor how much or how often we use technology sources to communicate. We have the power to become the most advance and smartest generation by using our resources. Manage your time wisely-go out and learn a new skill.

We need to rise up and become!!!

Stress

Finals week is coming up…you lost $100 dollars right before rent is due, your children have been bickering all day…what do you do to calm down from the stress of everyday life?

Helpguide.org gives amazing tips on how to manage your stress. They mention four A’s: avoid, altered, adapt, or accept.

What helps you to cope with stress?

Adam Knew Eve

“We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.” -LDS The Family a Proclamation to the World

Intimacy is not only a physically and emotional experience. It should be a  spiritual experience between man and women lawfully wedded. Sexual feelings are natural and God made us sexual beings and He wants us to be intimate with our spouse. Intimacy can be a touchy subject and it shouldn’t be. That being said…intimacy should not be joked about. In our society we have made intimacy a taboo subject which leaves kids curious and then they start to explore. I believe if it was an open subject there would be less teenage pregnancy and less premarital sex.

If you like it…put a medium size ring on it.

Check out this huffington post article!!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/03/expensive-weddings-study_n_5929056.html

“1. Men who spent $2,000 to $4,000 on engagement rings were 1.3 times more likely to end up divorced than men who spent $500 to $2,000. Women who received expensive engagement rings also experienced higher rates of divorce.

2.Women whose weddings cost $20,000 or more were 3.5 times more likely to end up divorced than women who spent $5,000 to $10,000. (According to The Knot, the average cost of a wedding in the U.S. is $30,000).”

This is also followed up by saying that if you spend $500 or less your divorce rate goes up as well.

Did you know the average U.S. wedding costs about $20,000!!!!!! That is a lot of money! I think weddings should be a non-stressful day to enjoy with friends and family. Normally when you are engaged people will offer to help with anything, or you can call some friends to help. This will save a lot of time and money. Your guests will probably enjoy your wedding if they have contributed to the fun day! This day is for you, don’t over do it with stressing about the money. Enjoy your wedding!