Have you noticed the more you nag and tell your children to do something, the less likely they are to do it. Here are some steps to try to make a difference in the way you approach asking your children questions:
- Use a polite request (Would you please pick up your clothes after your done reading?)
- next try an “i” statement (I would appreciate if you would help me clean the house by picking up your clothing)
- if that doesn’t work use a stronger statement (It makes me feel like I am a maid when you leave your clothes around the house, please pick them up now and we can discuss a consequence if you keep leaving your clothes around the house.)
Another suggestion is to use natural consequences. There should be a link between the action and consequence. If you take away a child’s cell phone for not doing the dishes, there is no connection between them. If your child never fills your car up with gas after driving around then you can tell them next time they leave the car on empty they will have to find another ride to their friends house. There is a connection in the second scenario: not filling up the car equals not driving the car.
These steps with your children and tell me what worked best for you!